I am back. What began as a necessary break due to dissertation writing, grew into a long "vacation" so to say as I left beloved Scotland behind to return to the United States. My visa wasn't up until January, but our money was running out and we couldn't very well try to find jobs (we still tried...) in the UK, especially after Brexit. So we did the "smart" thing and returned to find our first full-time jobs out of college. That was about seven weeks ago now. Jt has had one interview that didn't pan out, and I've spent most of my time pathetically moping around, "woe is me" type of stuff about being forced into adulthood without my consent.
But things are really looking up now. I feel much more positive. I don't know what it is, but I'm feeling more confident, more ready. I'm now using my free time to do productive, healthy things. Besides job hunting, I take exercise classes several times of week at the local YMCA. I read leisurely and outside, which is pretty much my favorite thing to do. I finished that Harry Potter book in the above picture, and man, finishing a book does feel great! I've done some sketching and hope to return to watercolor again (I have so many to share from my "break")! And I'm forcing myself to do necessary adult-like research, as well as actively seeking design inspiration, mostly from Pinterest, to prepare for my future career. I looked up how health insurance works for the first time (yes, US health insurance is a travesty and completely unfair, but necessary to understand). I'm going to take a financial health course with Jt to learn about savings, 401ks, — basically what to do with your money. There is something so liberating about taking control of your life and educating yourself.
Not that I don't have bad moments. Sometimes I get down in the dumps about being stuck in this limbo, as well as living with my family again. But I have to believe it's temporary. And I have to have faith in myself — literally just self-confidence. Job hunting is draining and constant rejection is hard. I'm having to go back to basics with this one. Sometimes I feel life 13-year-old me again, giving myself a pep talk.
And to be honest, this presidential election and modern feminist heroes are actually helping. I am a strong, confident woman! No one can take that away from me! (Or you!) As for the blog, I'm thinking about expanding its content. Beauty, but also design, photography, illustration, books — kind of what I envisioned from the beginning. We'll see where it goes.
Let's chat!